Where I am coming from...

WELL, here it is.

A recorded account of my life as a "semi" superMom for all the world to see. Closer to the truth, for my family who will see why slowly my notes in the mail that I used to be so good at, have all but disappeared and why my phone calls are so short.(why do kids go bazerk when I get on the phone?) Perhaps, this will also help me clear my over stuffed mind. Normally I will write about the goofy things happening at my house, but today I am writing a little about who we are and what I am dealing with this morning.

I also hope it helps other Moms feel better about the craziness of their own home, children and life in general! Oh, you are so not alone!

So first of all, who am I?

LOTS of things...

A Major Day Dreamer

I am a stay at home Mom of two: Tommy (2) who is ALL crazy boy, and Grace (6) who is the ORIGINAL Ramona Quimby. (I use the term "stay at home" very loosely)

Wife and personal Secretary to Ben for 9 years.

Art Director & Co founder of Art with Purpose-an art therapy program for "at-risk" teens.

Private Art Instructor

Artist

A (barely) Sr. Regional Director for Lemongrass Spa (local natural handmade spa products)

Table Leader in Mothers Of Pre Schoolers

Daughter, Sister, Aunt, "In-Law", Grand-Daughter, Friend, etc.

Worlds WORST speller, yet BEST excuse maker.

Constant Dieter who eats ice cream and nachos (but I have a really good excuse...)

Medical researcher, Insurance fighter, Pharmaceutical rep for Grace and Natural Medicine guinea pig.

Terrible Time Management Lady-I should be doing about 20 other things right now, but nope. I am starting a blog. Ben with just love that...

Then, lots of other things, but lets start here.

So that is the general of who I am and now we can move on.

This morning I want to talk a bit about my daughter Grace and who she has mysteriously become in the last year. I am sure I will talk about this more because it just baffles me so.

Grace is 6, in 1st grade and a very independent strong willed kiddo. She started out defiant and has kept it up for 6 years. This being said, she is also a great and really amazing kid.

Our biggest challenge currently with Grace. She is recovering from Encephalitis that left her with minor brain damage causing ADHD, epilepsy and a cognitive disorder. How strange is was to drop my girl off at school-who had become very self reliant and was exceptionally intelligent-and with in a few hours be rushing that same child, who was seizing, foaming at the mouth and unable to speak or walk, to the PICU. She hasn't been the same since, and yet she has recovered so much you wouldn't even know it had happened. Only her Mother and those very close to her on a daily basis notice now. We have been very blessed to get her back to where she is!

In that one day my life as a Mother changed so much. Before, I knew Gracie inside and out. I knew what her favorite foods were, her favorite things, what would make her cry, why she would do certain things and how to discipline certain bad behaviors. When we brought Grace home, these things had all changed and she was a very different little girl. She didn't like the same food, like the same things, she cried for no reason at all and was frustrated by the slightest thing (shoes have become the bane of my existence!). Where she was once inexhaustible, she was constantly tired. She did strange things like write everything backward, sentences, words and name. Where once she was most likely a gifted academic, she now couldn't process simple ideas. Before she had wonderful manners, she had now lost her "think before you speak" ability and appeared rather rude. And then, HOW do you discipline a child who has been through all this? I am still working on this, after all I am still responsible for raising a well adjusted, unspoiled person regardless of what hardships she has been through. I will not be around to explain rude behavior or the fact that she doesn't always comprehend what you say the first time-even thought it looks like she should. I can't say how hard it is to decide what is a brain issue and what is a willful 6 year old issue.

The progress Grace has made is no less than a gift from God. Her seizures are under control with meds, I know her favorites again, her academics have come back to where they were when this happened, her energy levels are in good shape. We are still working on the manners (what parents of a 6 year old aren't though!) and focusing on tasks at hand. We are on our 4th medicine for focusing-this is the last one I am willing to put her through. After this, we will just do exercises and try some more diet adjustments. Her emotional out bursts are still a daily or hourly issue, but this is just at home. We can handle that, after all she will continue to heal for up to another year.

I think back to laying in Grace's PICU room last December. I was laying next to her, zipped into her restraining bed with her, after a very rough and violent night. While the infection raged in her brain, she thrashed violently, hit us and screamed, spoke in what sounded like tongues, eyes rolling. It took many doses of sedatives to finally calm her down by about 3 in the morning. As I lay there watching her finally sleeping, a doctor came in and coldly told us she may never wake up. He said he sees kids who recover, but just as many who never wake up, then left. Ben and I stared at each other though the mesh of her bed restraint, unable to process this information. Within 5 minutes Grace sat bolt upright and asked, "Mama, where are we!?" She has amazed everyone from there on out!

Looking forward to what my amazing girl will do! She is full of funny ideas and sayings, a beautiful creative and sharp mind, and great athletic ability! We are close to "normal" but still working a few things!!!

All this has added considerably to our adventure.